“Any student of the rise and fall of cultures cannot fail to be impressed by the role played in this historical succession by the image of the future. The rise and fall of images precedes or accompanies the rise and fall of cultures. As long as a society's image is positive and flourishing, the flower of culture is in full bloom. Once the image begins to decay and lose its vitality, however, the culture does not long survive."

I have met with spiritual practitioners, activists, educators, students, leaders, environmentalists, and concerned citizens — all wrestling with the issue of manifesting a compassionate now and a generative future. I have heard criticism of those that “take action”, and I have heard criticism of those that “sit around and meditate or talk things to death”. I have heard rung the clarion bell of urgency, imploring me to do or be something. I have been told that the cost of lack of engagement is too high — our very existence and that of the planet is at stake. And I have been told that the price is too high — that we are not willing and capable of paying the price.

Yet, I resonate with the experience that the “ "H-S-L" Practice” offers a practical response to the world in terms of reducing suffering and despair — guiding me to pay attention to, study, and deeply participate in and understand my relationship to Self, Others, our Collectives, and our Ecosystems.

The Hearing | Seeing | Loving ("H-S-L") Practice
The "H-S-L" (Heard | Seen | Loved) Practice is a life legacy practice that provides a diagnostic and response approach for developing sympathy, empathy, and compassion. It places attention squarely on intentionally manifesting conditioning experiences that stimulate activation of multiple intelligences in ways that cultivate compassion and invite engagement in experiments that increase compassion and celebration in everyday life. The "H-S-L" Practice addresses the domains of Self, Others, Collectives, and Ecosystems.

The ""H-S-L" Practice" operationalizes the wisdom transmission from the Dalai Lama that:
“All people want and need to be Heard, Seen and Loved” ("H-S-L") — in that order !

When the "H-S-L" need is thwarted — mischief occurs. We experience suffering as signaled by fear and reacted to as the samadhi of anger.

I have discerned seven insights associated with the application of this wisdom transmission —

The First Insight is that “fear” has the physiologically useful purpose of bringing attention to an awareness that “something is not right”; and that “anger” has the physiologically useful purpose of directing attention to a single point focus (samadhi). They are both natural mechanisms of human consciousness evolved to increase our alertness, awareness, and responsiveness to conditions and conditioning. They serve as a set of stimulus and response systems.

The Second Insight is that suffering, mischief, and polarization occur when people experience not being Heard, Seen, and/or Loved ("H-S-L") — in that dependent sequential order. This insight leads to the "H-S-L" Diagnostic Model.

H-S-L Diagnostic Model —

Self (Intrapersonal) — Individual | Personal
"H-S-L" for the “Self” addresses the individual’s issues about “survival” in terms of physical, emotional, cognitive, and/or spiritual experiences — transforming “Rage to Compassion”, and landing the understanding that “I am loved”.

When we are not feeling Heard by ourselves — we bombard ourselves with Critical, Harsh, Judgmental, and/or Relentless Negative "Self-Talk"; Emotional and/or Cognitive “Numbness”. The "H-S-L" Response is: Deep inquiry and reflection into the causes, results, and conditions of the Negative "Self-Talk" and sense of “Numbness” — listening for insights, clarity, and an inventory of “what is”.

When we are not feeling Seen by ourselves — we find ourselves being Driven by and/or Obsessed with Controlling Feelings and/or Thoughts; "Well-Defended" persona and Beliefs. The "H-S-L" Response is: Accurate and true inquiry and feedback for challenging and deep understanding of unexamined: assumptions, values, beliefs, norms, communications, behaviors, and/or causal impacts — integrating insights, experience, and awareness into life practice and wisdom.

When we are not feeling Loved by ourselves — we develop feelings of Low "Self-Esteem", "Self-Loathing", and/or "Self-Hatred". The H-S-L Response is: Practicing “Presence” — Wisdom & Compassion — (unconditional love) as an unconditional skillful “gifting” of your “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), your integrative view and perspectives, awareness, attention, discernment, intuitions, humor, understanding, and mindfulness on your self — identifying, developing, and using your multiple intelligences to act from your experience of and awareness in the “present moment”.

Others (Interpersonal) — Individual | Interpersonal
"H-S-L" for “Others” addresses the individual’s issues about “survival” in terms of the experience of one-to-one relationships between people — transforming “Despair to Hope”, and landing the understanding that “I am not alone, and you are not alone”.

When “Others” are not feeling Heard by us — they either Shout or are Deafeningly Silent. The H-S-L Response is: Sympathetic deep inquiry with listening for clarity and learning.

When “Others” are not feeling Seen by us — they are Bullying and/or Intimidating; Shy and/or Hiding. The H-S-L Response is: Empathetic feedback and inquiry for deep understanding and shared connection.

When “Others” are not feeling Loved by us — they engage in “Come Here — Go Away” isolating type of dynamics. The H-S-L Response is: Practicing “Presence” — Wisdom & Compassion — (unconditional love) as an unconditional skillful “gifting” to others of your “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), your integrative view and perspectives, awareness, attention, discernment, intuitions, humor, understanding, and mindfulness — identifying, developing, and using multiple intelligences to act from your experience of and awareness in the “present moment”.

Collectives (Intrapersonal) — Gatherings | Organizations | Communities | Nations
"H-S-L" for the “Collectives” addresses the collective’s (Gatherings — assemblages — congregations | Organizations — groups — teams — families | Communities — villages — tribes — neighborhoods | Nations — leagues — federations — states, . . . ) issues about “survival” in terms of the individual and collective experience of “relevance” — transforming “Irrelevance to Relevance”, and landing the understanding that “I, you, and we are valued”.

When we are not feeling Heard collectively — we individually and collectively bombard ourselves with — and/or feel bombarded by — Critical, Harsh, Judgmental, and/or Relentless Negative "Self-Talk"; Emotional and/or Cognitive “Numbness”; and/or Shouting or Deafening Silence. The H-S-L Response is: Sympathetic deep inquiry and reflection into the causes, results, and conditions of the Negative "Self-Talk", Emotional and/or Cognitive “Numbness”, Shouting, and Deafening Silence — listening for insights, clarity, learning, and an inventory of “what is”.

When we are not feeling Seen collectively — we individually and collectively find ourselves being Driven by and/or Obsessed with Controlling Feelings and/or Thoughts; "Well-Defended" personas, Beliefs, and Myths; Bullying and/or Intimidating behaviors; and/or Shyness and/or Hiding. The H-S-L Response is: Accurate and true empathetic inquiry and feedback for challenging and deep understanding of unexamined (individual and/or collective) aesthetic, cultural, social, economic, ethnic, ethical, etc.: assumptions, values, beliefs, norms, communications, behaviors, and/or causal impacts — integrating insights, experience, and awareness into life practice, wisdom, and shared connection.

When we are not feeling Loved collectively — we develop feelings of Low "Self-Esteem", "Self-Loathing", and/or "Self-Hatred"; adopt “Come Here — Go Away” isolating type of behavior dynamics; and develop Inclusion — Exclusion — Welcoming issues. The H-S-L Response is: Practicing “Presence” — Wisdom & Compassion — (unconditional love) as an unconditional skillful “gifting” to others and your individual and collective selves of your “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), your integrative view and perspectives, awareness, attention, discernment, intuitions, humor, understanding, and mindfulness — identifying, developing, and using your individual and collective multiple intelligences to act from experience of and awareness in the “present moment”.

Ecosystems (Environment) — Local | Regional | Global
"H-S-L" for the “Ecosystems” addresses the individual and collective issues about “survival” in terms of “extinction” — transforming “Extinction to Generativity” and landing the understanding that there is systemic interconnectedness and continuity, and that “all things are interconnected”.

When we do not individually and collectively “Hear” our local, regional, and global Ecosystems — the ecosystems become highly stressed, which results in decreased habitats and biodiversity; reduced ecosystem productivity; and decreased recycling of resources. The H-S-L Response is: Deep inquiry and reflection into the causes, results, and conditions of the "Highly-Stressed" Local, Regional, and Global Ecosystems — listening for insights, clarity, learning, and an inventory of “what is”, and being informed by both the “sounds” of Nature (animals, wind, water, etc.) and Man (technology, processes, noise).

When we do not individually and collectively “See” our local, regional, and global Ecosystems — the ecosystems begin to exhibit systemic patterns of: plummeting biodiversity; species overpopulation; habitat and ecosystem destruction; increased biotoxin and pollutant production; decreased capacity to process and sequester biotoxins and pollutants; and decreased resource recycling capacity.

The H-S-L Response is: Accurate and true empathetic deep inquiry and feedback for individual and collective challenging and understanding of unexamined and known destructive systemic human and environmental patterns, processes, and causal impacts — integrating insights, experience, and awareness into daily life practices, shared wisdom, and sensed interconnectedness, seeing the beauty of the Ecosystems and their inhabitants.

When we do not individually and collectively “Love” our local, regional, and global Ecosystems — the ecosystems begin to exhibit "Out-Of-Control" Natural (Runaway) Processes Resulting in: extinction-level events; decreased biodiversity; species extinction; and long-term uninhabitable local, regional, and global ecosystems planetary environments. The H-S-L Response is: Practicing “Presence” — Wisdom & Compassion — (unconditional love) as an individual and collective unconditional skillful “gifting” to the Local, Regional, and Global Ecosystems of our “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), our integrative views and perspectives, awareness, attention, discernment, intuitions, humor, understanding, and mindfulness — identifying, developing, and using your individual and collective multiple intelligences to act from experience of and awareness in the “present moment” to achieve whole lifecycle sustainability and continuity of the Ecosystems and their inhabitants.

Through the lense of the "H-S-L" Diagnostic Model, my observation is that when polarizing, destructive behaviors and/or conversations are occurring, the participants are exhibiting the behavior modes that the "H-S-L" diagnoses describe — and will benefit from the suggested "H-S-L" Response !

The Third Insight is that where issues and/or behaviors are polarizing — “Segregation” versus “Integration,” or “Pro-Life” versus “Pro-Choice” — the wrong internal and communicated conversations are occurring, and people are faced with having to make equally wrong analyses and choices.

The "H-S-L" practice can lead to a more culturally mature dynamic by increasing the overall experience of interconnectedness and creativity; decreasing the tendency of falling into a “Unity Fallacy” where there is confusion regarding “Wholeness” (multiplicity) with “Oneness” (singularity) — thus forgetting that the converse of “Unity” (oneness or singularity) is “Wholeness” (multiplicity or diversity) --> not separateness or uniformity (sameness); and decreasing the tendency of falling into a Separation Fallacy that supposes that it is possible and/or desirable to view oneself as independent from the systems of relationships and dynamics that one is engaged in (observer, witness, by-stander, independent agent, . . . ) — calling for one to be “independent” of other people, a proposition which for me is a physical and meta-physical impossibility.

The Fourth Insight is that beneath polarity lies shared values, concerns, and suffering. These shared experiences are discovered through the practice of "H-S-L".

The Fifth Insight is that when conversations and behaviors are initiated from discernment and actualization of discovered shared higher purpose and values — then polarities dissolve in the pursuit of identifying and addressing the underlying causes and conditions of the polarizing behaviors and/or communications. These conversations and behaviors, in actuality, are open space for each participant to be Heard, Seen, and Loved.

And the Sixth Insight is that when I am most “Present”, I am most loving. When you are most “Present” to me, I feel most loved by you. My observation is that in my life story, I have felt most loved when I have experienced others as being fully “Present” to me — unconditionally giving me the “Gift” of their “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), view, authenticity, awareness, attention, understanding, wisdom, mindfulness, and compassion. And I have felt most loving when I have chosen to give the “Gift” of my “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity), view, authenticity, awareness, attention, understanding, wisdom, mindfulness, and compassion to others.

The Seventh Insight is that in order to experience unconditional love for another person, I must be willing to fully become their student and thus learn the pith of their life experience.

Living from the experience of interconnectedness and “wholeness” (depth | integrity| divinity) — of fellowship, community, humanity, and Agape — is a mutual act of discovering each others higher purpose and shared values through the practice of "H-S-L" with ourselves and each other. It leads to positive generative action in which we can experience a co-creation of a better world in the small and/or the large.

So, I have an invitation for you:
To conduct the experiments — in however the form feels right to you — and then share your process, results, and insights with me and each other so that we can mutually refine the practice of "H-S-L".